Stupid Cupid

So I am a HUGE holiday person!  Always have been, always will be.  I have no problem with celebrating the holiday on a different day, as long as THAT day is still made special in some way!   I have to do something special on birthdays, on Christmas, on Halloween, even on St. Patricks Day!  Its just who I am.

When you go through divorce (whether you wanted it or not) it is a form of grief.   Nobody really understands that unless they have been through it, but if you know someone(we all do sadly) who is going through that, realize that.  The most random things can set you off.   Bring on all kinds of emotions.   Holidays are very tough for anyone going through a divorce.   They are days you realize your family unit, whatever it was, is no longer in existence.   Which a lot of times shows you how much of your future and your dreams arent there anymore.  It can be very tough.

Valentines is particularly tough!   Think about it.  Its a holiday to celebrate couples and love and romance.   For me, it also happens to be the holiday I got engaged on.  Ugh.  But every time I walk into a store, oh my stars, I see the huge holiday displays and I literally just want to pop the balloons and knock everything down.  There will be no flowers or no heart shaped box of chocolates coming that way, and to me, the price of that is OK, but its still cruddy to go into every single store and be slapped with that EVERY TIME!

Yes, I have kids and I will be celebrating for their sake and put on my happy face for them.   They are my loves, they are special to me.  It is not the same though, and quite honestly, I kinda get tired of hearing it (NO OFFENSE, everyone means well and I know it and am not upset at anyone for saying it, I would have said the same thing if I was in the other shoes!).  So if you see me, or any other divorced man or woman just aggravated or irritable, love them through it!  Dont tell them how angry they are (its OK to be angry as long as you dont act on it, Im not actually going and popping all the balloons!).  Allow them to feel those things because that is part of the process of their healing and going through this awful process.   WE WILL GET THROUGH IT.   I am told the first year is the hardest and it gets easier each time after (it really is just like the process of grief!)

I actually will be going out with two other beautiful ladies in the same situation as me, surviving the divorce process, all different, all being affected differently.  No two cases are ever the same.   We will have a single mom night out, hopefully I can stomach all the lovey dovey couples everywhere.   I will eat a nice big burger and enjoy the friendships I am blessed to have.