I have an amazing 9 year old son. Last year, the dance company his sister (whose been in dance since she was 3) attended, started up a breakdance class. He was always dancing at home and I wanted him to have some kind of an outlet, so I signed him up and asked him to give it a try. He was slightly reluctant at first because he himself, at 8 years old at that time, had this idea that dance was only for girls. Luckily, when he showed up there were a bunch of other boys in the class too and his teacher was a very manly guy. My son became instantly hooked!!!! That kid has a natural talent for dance. The class was one of the best things for him too. There were days he would leave class crying because the move was just too hard for him. He has some real tendencies to be a perfectionist and a quitter in one (odd combo I know). If he cant do it perfect, he would get very frustrated and just want to quit. We were very blessed to have his teacher, Johnny. That man stuck with him and encouraged him and gave my son just what he needed. It got to the point that all my son did was dance! We would be in the grocery store and there he was just following behind me practicing every move he could.
Through that class, my son then learned of his favorite performer, Michael Jackson. He begs to see movies and look up videos of his dance moves and will truly study his feet and work hard to mimic the moves. I, being a big Michael Jackson fan myself, was pretty proud of this new huge interest of his.
This year, we switched dance companies (for no reasons against the previous company! Still love them, it was just a better move for our family and much more convenient). Luckily, his breakdance teacher also began teaching at the same studio (which we were not aware of at the time). At this new studio my son gets to take two all boy classes!! One that offers hip hop/breakdance, and one that offers tap.
Last night was his first night to get to dance in his new tap shoes, which he was very excited to have. Last night was also a very difficult night for my super buddy. It started out he had to get used to the tap shoes, they felt and sounded different then he expected and wanted to be perfect right away. He was almost in tears. I talked to his amazing tap teacher (who gave great tips to help) then I went to talk to him to see what was up and what we could do to help move him forward.
Well, in talking to him, the waterworks poured out of him. It wasn't just that he was frustrated learning the new shoes. When he couldn't get the moves out perfect, others peoples words poured into his little mind and heart.
"You cant dance."
"Dancing is just for girls"
"Dancing is not a sport"
"Your gonna be weird if you turn into a dancer"
Ugh, my mommy heart was broken. Anger boiled up inside of me. Didn't people see how much he LOVED to dance? Couldn't they see how amazing he was at it? How much joy and happiness boiled up inside of me. I tried to soothe him and reassure him, but I'm just his mom and another girl, what do I know? Luckily, his hop teacher (who is another awesome guy in his life) was still at the academy and was willing to talk to him (what a blessing he was!!!)
He sat down and shared with him some of his own struggles growing up (which were very similar). He also told him that male dancers get paid more than the females (I didn't know that!). He encouraged him that dancing was in fact a sport! I mean seriously, have you ever looked at the muscles these dancers have?!?!?!? Male and female alike! And the discipline it requires, oh my!
I mean can you do this? I know I cant!
or this?
And can I just say I am so sick of people thinking that because a boy chooses to dance it will mess with his sexuality preference? Football players wear tight shorts.....whats the difference? Because a boy chooses a different activity has nothing to do with all that at all! In fact, I truly believe the sport of dance is much more difficult than any other traditional "sport" a boy could choose! And come on, there are plenty of us out there with no rhythm at all (I'm guilty!) that are just jealous we don't have their moves!
I am thankful he has an awesome studio with a class of a bunch of boys who are like minded. He has two amazing guys for teachers who encourage him and teach him (and not just in dance). They support his love for dance and his quirky passion for MJ. They teach him its OK to be different.
(My son with his Breakdance teacher Johnny on the left; and his Hip Hop teacher Jerry on the right)
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